Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
My stomach is making the worst sounds, probably because there is nothing but semen in it.
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
Holy walk of shame. Fuck someone's house. I walked past a family eating their free continental breakfast wearing yesterday's makeup
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
bringing my vibrator into the shower with me. if I don't text back in 30 minutes I have electrocuted myself and died.
May the force be with you.
Worse: texted mom-in-law by mistake that I sharted.
Worser: she offered to clean me up
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
look on the scale of 1 to the time you hit an old lady with your car chlamydia barely even rates
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
Randomize
