Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
shhh. i hid the ranch dip behind the rooster. don't tell anyone that way you can find it in the morning and it won't be all eaten.
wrong number but thanks
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
The swelling on my elbow and tongue means I may have cockblocked myself.
You know you're a whore when you color code your calendar with who you slept with on what day incase you have ANOTHER pregnancy scare
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
If I pissed all over some chicks bed I would probably apologize for getting so wasted, not putting out, and turning into a god damn R. Kelly Cinderella... Not ask for coffee and a ride home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
do you think the dildo I'm bringing through airport security is considered a weapon?
Someone explain to me why I woke up to find a stolen shopping cart in my room...
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
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