Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
how was last night?
i woke up with my hand stuck in a jam jar with my keys in the bottom and a dog licking peanut butter off my boobs. you tell me.
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
Wedding update: no alcohol, 75% of people have left, no one is dancing, no single groomsmen, and it's 5:30. I'm going the fuck home to drink by myself.
I couldn't help thinking that my sock monkey was judging me
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
Where are you, who is in my bed, why is he wearing a spandex onesie as underwear, how did i get teethmarks on my forehead, what are we doing tonight?
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
The problem is drunk me is completely unaware how poor I am
It's Saturday night and I'm sitting on my couch by myself, watching Glee, and drinking gin and tonics. If you listen very closely, you can hear the wails of my mother giving up hope that I will ever give her a son-in-law.
If I had 3 wishes one would for sure be a designated driver for life that gives hand jobs.
He's like a unicorn and I just wanna domesticate him
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
Randomize
