she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
I told her for every minute she spent down there, I would donate a dollar to the Haiti relief fund... totally worked
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
Did you hear me? I HAVE THE CONTENTS OF AN NBA PLAYER'S CONDOM IN MY BEDROOM TRASHCAN!! This shit is potentially worth millions of dollars to a fertile young female who is ovulating. How do I sell it fast??
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
I pretty much told him I was too sober for this an just walked away and all I heard was "IT'S BECAUSE IM A BAD KISSER ISN'T IT" OVER AND OVER AGAIN
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
Randomize