my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
I'm tired and starving, and I'm pretty sure I just cost the company 33,000 dollars...fuck you and you're "you'll love going to work high" nonsense.
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
He? As in you personified your dick?
I got paid to fuck my boss for lunch. My job is better than yours.
Randomize
