Happy Easter!!!
I'm an idiot
Just opened a beer with eyelash curlers... miss you.
As soon as he lost the election, the reception's open bar became a cash bar. I have never been so disappointed in my countrymen.
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
Walked in the bathroom at work and my boss was taking a shit with the stall wide open and responded "oh yeah, I forgot you never have been to prison "
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
Pants are for mortals
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
I'm really sorry I bit your mom last night, it was completely uncalled for.
Dude, the T Swift concert might not be so bad after all. Can you say milfs living vicariously through their teenage daughters? Score.
Randomize