She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
So guess who got away with telling their girlfriend she's insane multiple times in a Valentine's day card. Yup, this guy.
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
Pretty sure one of my drivers stopped to get laid while he was delivering a pizza. Is it appropriate to give him a write-up AND a high-five?
I didn't have anyone to cheers so I tapped my beer on your fish tank... a little too hard
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
that's the second time my extensive knowledge of taylor swift has gotten me laid
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