I want to walk on stilts...naked
why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
He asked me who my new boyfriend was and I showed him a picture of my sex toys.
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
I bet you my entire life savings of $0 that there's a Doctor Who porn parody and that it features the sonic screwdriver being inserted into some cavities
Randomize
