My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.
I just passed a drug test. I want to shout that from the top of a mountain. Can we have beers on the top of a mountain?
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
It says something about our relationship that he stole your phone to tell me about his dick at 3am and neither of us realized that wasn't you until just now
He passed out in my car.
What's the problem?
HE'S STILL IN MY FUCKING CAR.
My mom purposely got me drunk so I can stay at her house bc "we don't spend enough time together." I blacked out anyway, so we didn't spend time together regardless.
Randomize
