mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
just come out here and I will go home with you...
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
Is there a card that says "Sorry I got drunk at your Christmas party and tried to steal your monogrammed hand towels so that I could give you something nice for Christmas"?
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
I was trying to remember why my knees hurt then I remembered I was twerking on the countertops.
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
Naw dude theres seriously a lobster in my sock drawer. Why?
Randomize
