I'm at work and it's 1:30. I need a beer. is that bad?
Welcome to every minute of my life.
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
Eating meat and looking at porn while roommate is at church for Ash Wednesday. Win.
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
So hungover. They actually hid easter eggs around me.
He was dressed as ron burgundy and his pickup line was "dont worry, i wont make you jump in a bear pit."
Someone painted a weed leaf on my leg with red paint. Or blood. I hope paint.
Holy fuck just found a used tampon in the leg of my pants. it's not paint. It's. Not. Paint.
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
Dislocated my knee during sex, popped it back in and kept going. Then got simpathy chipotle out of it too.
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
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