Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
No stitches, just platelets and will power
She told me she couldnt give me head last night because she was running out of listerine
a girl just told me i should have been born earlier in the alphabet
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
ok, I understand that your bathroom door is broken, but at least close the blinds next time you take a shit. The entire parking garage just watched you.
cell reception changed and I can no longer text you from the toilet... that means I'll be texting you less often, just fyi
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
I just melted my phone trying to make cookies. I think that's a sign.
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
Randomize
