i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
I smell like Captain Morgan and tears
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
It might be whiskey, but I view Marge and Homer Simpson as something to strive for
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
I want you
Nvm, now I want someone who replies to my booty-call texts faster
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
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