They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
Oh my god I haven't had mozzarella sticks since I banged that Applebee's waiter
i asked him to talk to me in french while we fucked and halfway through i caught the word 'lasagna'. turns out he was making his grocery list.....i asked him to keep going.
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
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