So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
I feel like I should come with a warning like "Orgasm free since 1983"
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.
Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
Thanks for having me over last night. Sorry I licked rum off your kitchen floor.
Its 9 am & i've been cleaning for 6 hours now with occasional crying bursts and two cocktails. Adulting 101.
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
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