Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
He looked me in the chest and said "I think I was visited by the titty fairy last night"
just took a pee in my own yard...decided i had to poo..only got a dingle berry....wiped it away with my finger..help me...my mom AND dad are home.
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
The hospital said it would be 'irresponsible' for them to allow people to book stomach pumps.
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
Here's a tip. Don't party with someone that needs sexual attention. Drinking and sexual attention don't mesh well in the morning. Especially over a bowl of Cheerios.
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
How do I tell this guy that if he does not like the condoms at my apartment, he should bring his own without sounding like a sure thing?
Say it's BYOC night at the beach. And, you are a sure thing. Own it.
Randomize
