well i just puked at a family gathering so i can cross that off the bucket list
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
I am 48% hangover, 48% bruises and 2% fingers I'm texting with.
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
I'm so stoned I just sat here for like at least 45 min thinking about how I would get some jack in the box tacos if only I knew where my wallet was and then I kind of blinked and finally noticed I had literally been staring at my wallet the ENTIRE fucking time
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
I just pawned the ring from my ex boyfriend to replace the ring I lost from my current boyfriend. #thanks
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
I've been drunk texting you for weeks, and you watched me puke outside your house... I say it's time we meet in person.
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