maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
Apparently last night I sat at the bar with an upside down sharpie lightning bolt on my forehead, yelling "It's Harry Potter's birthday! Let me be on the qudditch team!" And I kept calling the bartender Dobby. There are videos.
Do you ever look at a vegetable and think "that would be awesome to shove up my vagina"?
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
I'm going to give blood tomorrow. Prepare yourself for pictures and a cynical poem about the heart and its level of tangibility.
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
It's not my fault, Tequila turned all my alarms off.
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
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