on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
The bridesmaids just went smackdown on the floor, over the bouquet. I saw nipple. Best wedding ever
my dealer just handed me my weed in a pink easter egg
i asked if you wanted help changing your sheets after you threw up in bed. you politely declined. i take no responsibility after that.
He just gave a drunken 7 minute speech on how to make the perfect grilled cheese. he explained types of butter and cheeses....i think i love him
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
How bad would it be to ask my maintenance man for new blinds because the dude puked on those too?
It was all fun and games until she said "you're so pretty I wanna punch you in the face" and the proceeded to punch her in the face
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
It doesn't matter if it's only been 3 days since you last changed your sheets. If your fuck buddy comments on how your bed smells like sex, it's time to change them again.
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