is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
i'm sorry i gave your brother a handjob while you were on the blanket next to us, but to be fair your back was turned.
She's got a butler. A fucking butler. Shes like batman, but with a better ass.
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
It's 2pm, and I just had to pass a guy in the turning lane because he was driving down Main Street in an electric wheelchair pulling a flatbed trailer with 2 of his buddies in it and they were all drunk holding beers.
Haha! You know I mean that in a positive way. Like, "let them eat cake!" Or in our case, "let them achieve obesity from the two entree plate at Panda Express!"
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
I'm in my onesie attempting to spoon-feed myself cold soup. I'm playing freeze tag with my hangover. My hangover's winning.
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
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