Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
Besides the flaccid incident, it was decent. Average sized. So this is my life now. Loneliness and lackluster sex.
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
her wearing orange crocs at the bar was definitely a great form of contraception
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
Hey nothing wrong with those! I can't believe the guys who let me see where they live on first dates. Even more surprising, I don't stalk them after they've done me wrong.
I'm honestly wondering if my vagina did something to offend the universe
I'm hoping the sedatives kick in before I drunkenly decide to eat this whole cheesecake.
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
Randomize
