so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
Tried to bribe the bartender with wedding cake. Felt bad for not giving her a tip.
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
I dislocated my rib eating pizza. I think I am broken.
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
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