this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
I'm flagged. Drank strippers water. Flashed Dave tryin to get a job here. You order the shots. Green tea betch.
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
spending today hungover and untagging myself from all the pictures of me kissing girls so grandma doesnt have a heart attack. how was your new years?
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
How the hell do you misplace a bag of tacos in a closet?
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
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