He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
I just realized that the thing that smelled like an electrical fire in my house was me.
Sarah's knitting me a hat as an apology for unknowingly making out with my boyfriend
I love it when he cheats on me with nice people
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someone needs to lock me in a chastity belt because all my vagina does is get me into trouble. Fuck.
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
Randomize