If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
Whatcha textin bout Willis?
I showered today. Officially upgrading myself to useless.
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night.
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
Last night I had a dream that I changed my last name to Vodka. what does that say about my life?
So not only did I get laid today but I also left with a 42” tv lol
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
Randomize
