I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
I keep finding coffee grounds in my vagina
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
Where are you? This girl fell on a baby. She is just gone. Please Hurry
I'm hurrying
Dude. She just shit herself.
You know its good night when theres makeup smears on the toilet seat
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
Eye drops are like seatbelts of being high. Think about it
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
MY INSIDES ARE BASICALLY BEING WRUNG BY A CHAINSAW IM NEVER TAKING PLAN B AGAIN
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
I canceled a date last night to eat pop tarts and go to bed early
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
Randomize