What would Jesus do? ... Jesus would slap a ho.
She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my mom just asked if she should wash your furry handcuffs with the lights or darks
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
Apparently I told the bartender to stop putting ice in my drink because it was taking up too much room
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
Because you touch yourself at night.
...What time of day am I supposed to do it?
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