your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
Five things that make you perfect. Go.
The skin of a dead hooker. The blood of the innocent. The soul of a kitten. The hat from cat in the hat. And sunglasses.
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
After your mom took her 12th and fatal tequila shot she proceeded to fall head first into the bonfire... Guess I don't have to fear getting old after all
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
She slapped me in the face with a McDouble. Just threw it right at my face while I was driving... That is why we can't bring her out in public.
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
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