Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
a woman just threw her tv out the window while screaming "will you fucking work now?". i'm never moving
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
im flying all the way to minnesota to see him for four days... cutest-best-friend-reunion or most-epic-booty-call-ever?
who says it cant be both...
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
Well, my mom brought up me being vague about losing my license and she gave me the intervention look. so i left before they could bring out their heartfelt letters...
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
Only a true best friend would remind you to make sure your cucumber dildo is organic
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
I mean I'm completely serious and also drunk.
What a great combination.
I hate closet cases. I've been wooing this chick the entire quarantine. We finally meet up tonight, we're two drinks in, I've got my hand half way up her skirt and her husband calls. She promised to bring home dinner.
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