I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
Just bought a handle of vodka with the excuse of "just in case we drink tonight"
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
He's not replying to my booty call. Like wtf. You have ONE PURPOSE IN LIFE.
I'm using the Malibu pitcher you stole from the bar to make pancakes this morning. It's actually working really well.
Had a dream I dropped the L word and immediately threatened to kill myself
You probably shouldn't be having nightmares about expressing affection
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
Started my new year off by being hospitalized with pneumonia. You?
Found out I'm pregnant.
I'll stick with pneumonia.
Randomize