At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
Puked in a cab. Passed out on my floor an my mom put a blanket over me. Home by 1045. I won shitshow trophy last night.
I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
He obv doesn't know that telling a woman to chill will get him murdered
Just once, I'd like to make it to my first wedding anniversary for a change.
Randomize
