i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
He cooked me dinner. I showed my appreciation by showing up shithoused and breaking a bottle of steak sauce on his floor.
I ended up staying at a police station for being a witness in a public masturbation case..NOW do you believe me that I've never had a good St. Patrick's Day?
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
My dad just said "fuck circus"
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
I want to eat a stick of butter
Did your pain meds kick in?
It tastes nice
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
Randomize
