I misunderstood what a threesome is. Please come pick me up.
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
If you could smell my eyes you'd understand the whole story
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
We were in the middle of fucking and she was just like "Do ya wanna play Harry Potter Scene It?" I musta been really bad lol Anyways, her tattoo healed nicely.
The amount of effort it's taking me to not shit my pants this morning is probably a sign to slow down the drinking
A blind guy just told me that even he could see i was gay and encouraged me to chat up the girl behind that counter bc he thinks we'd make a cute couple. Are all Canadians this helpful?!
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
Randomize
