Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
She's in the bathroom crying cuz she can't get the condom out of her giner. Do you have tongs?
How come I'm the only one who's around when people show up? I had just taken a shit, I wasn't wearing pants, phantom of the opera was playing and the fridge said PENIS.
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
your like the ambassador to my penis.
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.
Randomize
