dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
Apparently while trying to get up from vomiting in the toilet I grabbed the seat cover for leverage and smashed my own head between it and the bowl. I don't remember this.
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
I'm at his house right now making him pancakes to compensate for YOU not giving him a handjob last night. You're welcome.
I found a door knob in my purse this morning, I hope whoever it belonged to doesn't need it today.
hahahah
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
Randomize
