Trimmed my pubes and broke your paper shredder. Separate events.
I found a knife in my bed when I got back this morning. I think one of my roommates has it in for me
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
she's just sitting here eating cilantro out of my herb garden and watching some show about ducks on tv and laughing, what the fuck did you give her?
He asked me where I wanted it. I told him in the condom. He stops mid thrust and says "you're no fun" and then blew. Chivalry is semi dead.
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
I licked your asshole in confidence.
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
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