We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
I just made a moltov cocktail out of lubricant and a christmas bulb. The fire is still going strong. MERRY CHRISTMAS
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got an Edible Arrangement my parents sent me for my birthday. Time to marinate some fruit in vodka.
Day 8 of being sober: Sniffed an empty beer bottle at a restaurent and almost licked it. This is not working
He just got home drunk. He ate 5 snack cakes, said Little Debbie's his bitch, went upstairs and fell asleep.
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
Dude, for your own safety, do not bring that chick home. I'm pretty sure you're going to find a marsupial pouch smuggling a fresh batch of herpes under that hoodie. Bail bail bail bail bail.
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
Pretty much just farted directly in a baby's mouth on the subway
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
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