Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
She's like a pop up book from hell.
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you set the microwave for an hour telling me that the done sound was your alarm.
you're a mystery wrapped in an enigma. wrapped inside a burrito.
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
I got Green Bay stickers to put on my nipples. This way when I flash it will look like I did it out of spirit as opposed to drunkenness
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
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I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
You were sober bartending last night right?
Sorta. I remember you crying, ripping rose petals off the flower stem and slowly sprinkling them behind the bar at me and singing softly
Romantic
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