Did you see that girl I got with last night?
Girl? Oh...weird...to be honest Ive always thought you were gay..
dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
I'm still pretty stoned. There are mini rice cakes in my robe pocket to snack on in the shower.
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
There's a girl passed out on the sidewalk at the parade. Its not even 10am. She gave candy to children saying it was ketchup. Still think I have a problem?
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
This toilet bowl is my home.
I just smoked weed out of a tomahawk, then chased an armadillo with said tomahawk, I love my life.
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