she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
The only coherent words in the 6 texts i recieved were don't, cute, fucking, beer, and lions
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
I was just doing the math on how much beer we need for the houseboat. in doing so, I came to the conclusion that we need to open a beer distributor business.
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
I just walked by a dude at the gym covering himself in olive oil.
Randomize
