why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
i told him that if he starts being sappy its friends = off. he called me jerkface and drew on me w permanent marker. im either in love w him or we are twelve.
I considered driving home in his mom's bathrobe until i realized i'd have to stop to buy cigarettes
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
I love how my cats smell like pot.
Im doing shots of vodka in the bathroom covered in pillows.
Tornado warnings are fun!
The bartender just asked me if I owned stock in Jameson. I've been here for less than an hour and he's already judging me.
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
He thought I was gay. I had to explain I just really like wearing flannel.
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
Let's take a shot for every time we've said "I don't want to get that drunk tonight"
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
Randomize
