all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
I was just crying my tits off and he was just sitting there listening. I was an open book of embarrassing life stories.
Wine is not your friend.
We had a weird moment. Mid-sex he started talking. It went along the lines of "I. FUCKING. LOVE.....this condom..."
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
hes sooooo boring!!! I feel like I’m in a relationship with myself now. I have an 8 inch dildo under my bed, THATS how much I’m in a relationship with myself.
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
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