Dude my mom stole all your condoms
I didn't slap you in the face. TEQUILA slapped you with my hand...
youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
I know you are passed out now but when you wake up in the morning your keys are in the freezer and your probly gunna want to apologize to your gf...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
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