giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
Man, jail baloney is awful.
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
Walking down the street trying to find the pants I had on last night
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
I'm currently on an epic search all over the city for a drug store that isn't sold out of Plan B. I celebrated your birthday from afar.
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
Randomize