why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
his text ended with ... everyone knows dot dot dot equals infer sexy time
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
Incoming: this is a booty call. To accept, please reply with an appropriate time. To reject, please reply "N" and the information will be filed for future reference.
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
My asshole is basically a geyser at this point. Minus the excitement. Plus blood.
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
I had to warn the neighbors
Warn them about what?! It's noon
"Pay no attention to me if at random points of the day I'm outside with kitty cat ears on" I'm a mess...
BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
Randomize
