My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
Leaving ole miss girls house to go to the stripper girls house. Why did it take losing my job to start getting laid all the damn time?
They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.
that girl from work that wants to bone me just said 'the last time i went this long without sex was in jail'. sup, red flag
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
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