We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
he was so drunk I had to hold him up and he started crying when he heard an ambulance siren and said "is that for me?"
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
You then played what you called "a smooth jazz rendition of talk dirty to me" all thrusting your crotch at the bartender. Mom looked horrified, but my dad couldn't stop laughing
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
fuck sobriety. I want to wake up tomorrow in a park or some shit.
The worst part is there are all kinds of happy creatures out here like fucking snow white and i'm sitting in semi-dead grass, hungover with a burnt butt
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
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