So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
Tim hortons said i dont meet their criteria. What the fuck criteria is that? You put bagels in an oven.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
woman puking in liquor store parking lot at 9:30 on a tuesday morning = best commute ever.
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
We were on the beach when you spilled sand in the bottle and said "relax it's vodka, it'll disinfect itself"
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
Birthday wine tasting got super shambly super quickly. I am covered in cuts/bruises/terrible life decisions.
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
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