she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
you ate dog biscuits in front of my dogs and laughed at them for not have opposable thumbs
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
Can I just lay in bed and you pour vodka through a funnel in my mouth?
premonition: im going to wake up covered in mashed potatoes
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
Honestly it was like 3 AM and I only agreed to go to the strip club because I wanted chicken tenders
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
Randomize
