You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
I'm sorry I kept calling last night when you wouldn't pick up. I'm REALLY sorry I sang "You Oughta Know" on more than 4 voice mails.
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
The second time he came it projectile shot in my ear
We were in a spooning position and it shot all the way up. He was like sorry. Physics.
He keeps asking the karaoke guy to play let it go from frozen so he can sing it in a falsetto
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
Seriously. Are we going out tonight? If we're not, I'm going to put on sweatpants and do drugs.
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
I'm in Florida in a retirement community the fuck am I supposed to do but watch tv and disgrace Jesus
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
You threw him in the dryer?
He went in of his own accord. Mumbled something about experiencing the blossoming of popcorn.
Randomize
